Three Monkey Syndrome
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Wednesday, 02 January 08 - 09:54 AM (GMT) By Hemant P desai in Matters of Mind |
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Following is FunkyGuru's (that's me, for those who don't know) interpretation of three monkeys in real world in modern times.
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In my younger days, I was taught the lessons learnt from the famous 'three monkeys'. I always wondered, how come we have to learn from monkeys? Aren't we supposed to be more intelligent than them?
Well never challenged the authority and still I don't. I have realised that it's better to find your own simpler ways of understanding life rather then conforming or confronting the established belief system.
In modern times I see people suffering from something that always took me long to explain. By the time the explanation was over, listeners and readers would loose interest.
Last night, I had inspiration that gave me the following interpretation of the three monkeys in modern times. Rather then they representing wisdom, they represent the lack of it. They still remain the wise monkeys but by mocking what we are doing, these monkeys are reflecting our mistakes and the pain that we suffer from that. So here is the new interpretation:
Original :
The monkey with mouth covered: Speak no Evil
The monkey with ears covered: Hear no Evil
The monkey with eyes covered: See no Evil
My Version:
First of all I call it as the "Three Monkey Syndrome". All those who are suffering can be labelled as suffering this three monkey syndrome:
The monkey with mouth covered: I won't express my true feelings
The monkey with ears covered: I won't listen to the message from Universe
The monkey with eyes covered: I won't see the reality
Well this inspiration is pretty new and I guess I will need to refine it further more. Till then, hope you enjoy this different interpretation of three monkeys and maybe contribute towards refining it and making it more contemporary.
Live with your heart and Think with your mind
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Wednesday, 02 January 08 - 09:41 AM (GMT) By Hemant P desai in Matters of Mind |
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Most of the people confuse the role of 'heart' and 'mind'. Since ancient times, heart was associated with life, emotions and feelings. Where as mind was always associated with intelligence, rational and reasoning.
Confusion in the role of heart and mind leads to conflict and conflicts create tension in life. Going back to earlier articles and reasoning presented, life is simple, let's keep that way. One exercise that will help keep it simple is to keep the heart and mind constrained to their role.
First of all, let's understand what does it mean to 'live with your heart and think with your mind'.
Do you remember, one day, when you were walking down the street, or travelling by bus/train or you were in supermarket or mall, in other words you were in some public place. You catch a glimpse of person. You have never seen that person, you will never see that person again. Still for some reason, you feel very attracted to that person. That person does not even resemble anyone from you past. That person is not even attractive or looking something extraordinarily different. That person is just another ordinary human being. Could be a man, a woman, an old man, a little kid, a street vendor, a taxi driver ... just anybody.
On the other hand, you see someone, in similar situation and this time instead, you feel like going and slapping that person or simply you just don't like that person. For no reason at all.
How about mind? Mind's role is to analyse. Analysis is done, based on data. Data is always of past. Hence mind, usually lives in past. For example, people when they grow, start forming their own views and opinion. Based on their views, opinion and experience they make their choices. Especially in the field of personal relationships.
Martin and Jessica, were discussing the issue of heart and mind with me at a party where we were invited. After listening the arguments, Martin wanted to know how to differentiate between what is heart feeling or mind thinking. Whereas Jessica wanted to learn how to live with heart and think with mind.
For Martin, my suggestion was as follows:
Go to a park or possibly out of town, in to country side, where there is less of urbanisation and more of nature to see. Hear the sound of birds, the wild calls of strange animals, see the unseen trees and never imagined colours. I asked him to do this just casually. Simply walking through the nature seeing the colours, hearing the sound and smelling the fragrance. Not thinking about what it reminds you of but feeling the moment how it makes you feel like.
Once this exercise is done often, the heart is automatically retrained to live and express the 'moment' as it experiences it. Rest all is your mind.
Solution for Jessica was simpler:
I asked her to close her eyes and guess what time it was. Not approximate time but more accurate time. When she mentioned time, I asked her to open her eyes and look at her watch and see how accurate/inaccurate she was in predicting the time.
She was to keep doing this exercise till she found her accuracy in 'sensing' or 'feeling' the time. Most of the time our mind is so over occupied that we miss the real world and the real timing of our everyday life.
Next article will be last in the series of stress management. I will continue writing more on various topics of life, health and happiness. Please do comment and send in your questions. I will be more than happy to reply to your questions.
Reality vs. Perception
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Saturday, 15 September 07 - 08:38 AM (GMT) By Hemant P desai in Matters of Mind |
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Lately I have been facing a lot of questions pertaining what is reality. Not that I am any expert on that subject but as I like to, I tried to put my mind to at least understand the question.
I have always said, before trying to find an answer, see if you understand the question in the first place.
So on reality, I was pondering for few days. Is it what we believe is reality or what we refuse to believe is reality? I cut my self while preparing some meal. It hurts. That is reality? Or because I believe, since I am cut, it hurts, that is reality?
No I don't mean to say that if I start believing it won't hurt even if I am cut, will become reality.
I realized that there is a very fine yet distinct line between what is reality and what is perception. this distinction is that unchangeable border that stops our progress and evolution.
Some examples to be considered.
There are people, and many of them, who lead a miserable life. If you enquire with them, they always someone or something else to blame their misery to. Seldom they take the responsibility of their own affairs. Their reality, is their perception that life is not going to improve for them. Loss of motivation, self esteem and self respect. There is no love for life or gratification of being alive and able. Constantly complaining and doing nothing about making change. Is it real?
There are some other people, very few, who irrespective of the circumstance, have a brilliant smile on their face. They may be suffering from deep pains, emotional or physical, but rarely let it spill out. They bring goodness around. They bring hope to living. Usually this people sooner then later, do succeed in their lives. Very few of them. Where is reality in their world? That pain or the that smile?
This led me to another aspect to think and ponder upon. The 'power of intent'.
One can make changes, cross that fine definitive line between perception and reality and lead a life which is more fulfilling. The power to change misery in to joy. Power to convert sorrow in to happiness. To convert tears in to laughter. Yet not forgetting the reality, that pain is inevitable. Just like death.
The important aspect here is that of self conciousness. Tricky word this conciousness is. Every time I used this word in my conversation or writing, people suddenly gave a unnecessary intellectual/philosophical 'high' importance to the event. Suddenly they start 'behaving' differently. Unfortunately so many spiritual teachers and gurus have used this terminology so loosely now that it has lost it's simple meaning.
The word conciousness once again takes you back to the fine definitive difference between reality and perception. So given the understanding of conciousness, in terms of understanding the reality versus perception, I find it is rather easier to work with ones own conciousness. For a moment, set aside the belief, the knowledge, the education, the opinion and the suggestions from outside, and you will see your own conciousness clearly. You will that distinctive fine line that separates your reality from your own perception.
Once you see this, you will also realise that your perception is also part of your reality. Mind boggling isn't it? Well I am still working on this concept and also on 'power of intent'. Someday soon I am sure I will have much clearer picture and much simpler words to express.
Are you being used/abused?
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Monday, 10 September 07 - 12:45 PM (GMT) By Hemant P desai in Matters of Mind |
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Haven't you ever had that feeling that you are being used? Especially by someone close to you? Or maybe someone you really care for is over using your generosity? Don't you feel like breaking from it?
First of all to learn how to stay away, first thing one must learn it to know that you are being used. It is one of the most difficult things to do in this world.
Most of the time, the person involved is a person we have a feeling for. Whatever this feeling may be. Romantic, friendly or plain old fashioned sympathetic. Because of such feeling we are blinded and we simply cannot see the fact. We tend to ignore the evidences of the reality. We tend to overlook the bright and clear signs warning us of cheating we are exposed to. We don't see any fault in those people. We in fact we go out beyond reasonable limits of giving them benefit of doubt. Many times we fool ourselves by believing they will learn the lesson and change.
It never happens. They never learn. They always make another sad story and one more after that. They drain your energy in all forms. Financially, emotionally and purely energetically they suck away like parasites. You get hurt but that emotional blinding numbs your senses. You do get pain but you don't register that pain. You ignore it. You neglect it. You simply shrug it off saying that's life.
This doesn't help anyone. Definitely not you nor the person who is cheating you.
I speak from my own experience. This experience has brought me to a point from where, now I can see the pitfall. From this experience I wish to share the knowledge with people and hope that they don't fall in the same trap.
Think clearly on the following points / questions: If this questions give you any insight, work on how would you use the new information to better your own life. As always, I am more than happy to answer to your questions and get some good input to further refine the method of saving our selves from being used.
Do You:
- do it naturally or feel compelled to?
- stretch yourself for being of use/help to other?
- act out of your own free will or you are usually asked to/called upon?
- ever consider your own priorities/limits before shelling out?
- feel obligatory to help?
- do it make yourself feel good?
- help so that you can win over people?
- help because you think you are making a change in their lives?
- really believe it is going to help them?
- ever consider if it is helping you or not?
This list can go on and each person from their individual experience can add and share their experience here with me and others.
I would wait for some response and soon enough I will write my own experience on my experiments with helping others. The amount of losses/gains are for individuals to justify but I will still quantise some so that there is a balanced perspective offered on the issues.
It's not an attempt to make someone look bad or feel bad. It's my own expression. One of those things that has been lingering on my mind for long. Realising that world is indeed a great place, provided one values the self worth.
This is not about stopping to help people. It's about realising that not every one needs help. We ought to weed out those fakes against the genuine. It's a difficult call but trust me friends, it is needed. Many a times it turns out that these people are none other then our own friends, family, people we really care for. But we are taken for granted. We are assumed.
In the end, we suffer. We keep quiet. Good hearted people that we want to be, we never even acknowledge of having make this mistake.
Why we fool ourselves? Isn't that another form of emotional escape we always look for? Probably we help others so that we always remain in demand and surrounded by people. We need this because we are afraid to be alone. Maybe we haven't found ourselves yet. That is why we need an excuse to be needed.
Clarity of thought is one thing that has always escaped us. It is not difficult to achieve. It's just that we don't want to achieve it.
Someday, I am sure, I will have that courage to seek clarity and live life more fulfilling. I am not complaining at my current life and still aspiring for a little bit more so that I can share it with others. I have had a fair amount of my share of hardship, betrayal, pain, sorrow and losses. Now I seek is my fair share of comfort, loyalty, joy, happiness and some achievements.
... More items are available in my News Archive
